We Pray for our families Health first and foremost, We pray for Peace in Ukraine. We pray for accessible provisions to help the unstable and emotionally challenged. We pray for radical revisions in gun laws. Reposting this piece – now more than ever it has a fervent ring to it.
I hope when I read this at 90, G-d willing, I am smiling. I pray that I used up whatever talents I had. I’ll then know my soul was soothed along the way by the things that gave me satisfaction. Whether it was a piece of writing, doing an art project or cooking a couple of great meals I will be happy knowing I did these things over and over again. Please let my loved ones outlive me. Biding adieu to the precious people who helped my heart skip beats would be treacherous. An octave of my music stopped every time I lost someone- the pain excruciating. Selfish, albeit protective. When my time with someone was up I hope I knew when to walk away. In turn, I hope I quickly saw their part in my journey was completed when they walked. Lingering wasted time- to be sad was not to be productive. Perhaps I learned a lesson, or just my share of bad luck. When given the chance to assist those who were less fortunate I would like to be reading that I paid it forward. Whether it was a hand me down of medical experience or protecting a beloved through a stormy moment; I hope I gave it with love and honesty. I hope my relationship with my sister’s ultimately became very good for longer than it wasn’t so good. I loved them indeed. I hope my husband got that I did my best as a refugee of lost wars emotionally. I hope he felt the love through my actions. I pray my nieces knew my love for them was fierce in every way. I can’t imagine our grandchildren won’t just know how much they helped make my life wonderful. As I am reading this fast forward- my desire is to see that I made people laugh. Perhaps not everyone got my humor or saw the funny as I did- but I loved to laugh and got a kick out of silly. I know it kept me healthier and happier then be-moaning a fate not loaned to me.

As far as jealousy, I hope I recognized how blessed I was. No one gets it all, but I believe I had a dose of great that propped up the not so great. If I hurt people’s feelings I hope they knew it was out of insecurity and with no malice or forethought. If I am reading that I became a fan of exercise, ate more vegetables and bettered impulse control I will be thrilled.

With all this said I hope that I found a place in my charity of choice where a good deal of who I was lingered. Giving was more rewarding than receiving. Carrying that thought with me allowed for the powerful self concept that kept me focused on the prize of my Life! And if I am unable to read this I hope one of you are reading it to me. I held you dear.

Alexander Graham
Hold on to your Bell.
Listen very closely to this tale we will tell.
4 out of 7 people walking on the street,
Faces we will never know,
No one we’ll ever greet.
The instrument you invented, that sat upon our desk,

Came alive with a Ding a Ling and oh, you know the rest.
An hello was the greeting,
The connection came so strong.
We got to schmooze and gossip.
Tell a joke, sing a song.
145 years later and
The world has gone to hell.
Oh, Alexander we need to be “saved by the bell.”
We are carrying, pressing and gazing at your namesake like no other.
You brought communication, from one house to another.
We speak with our friends and check in with each other.
If you could see the spin off, we are holding in our hands.
The newest and most modern always in demand.
You gave us communication, sensibilities though were lost.
In fear of missing an email, a text at any cost.
We are talking while we’re walking
Our stories overheard,
Every Tom, Dick and Harry can hear our every word.
Let’s travel back in time, when a phone call cost a dime.

We had a party line and it all seemed just fine.
We couldn’t take a picture or play a word with friends,
It simple was a means to a very happy end.

Hail mah jongg long haulers.
The game is here to stay.
From New York to Florida,
They can’t keep away.

The tables are plenty.

 The snacks such a treat.

Sit down, mix the tiles while adjusting your seat.

While Jokers run wild,
And Flowers often dear,
Quints and Concealed hands,
Make winning quite rare.
Leave your worries on the doorstep,
As you enter the room.
That has the sign hanging-
“No Doom, No Gloom.
We talk over each other,

Therapeutic indeed.
Gossip -as part of the day to succeed.
Making the hands and rolling the dice.
Nothing is naughty it Always feels nice.
As the day comes to closing,
And we say our good-byes.
We always remember to keep our eye on the prize.

No Rhyme-All Reason. Landlubbers, drindl skirts and bell bottoms. Tennis sweaters, weejun penny loafers and madras blouses. Typewriters, wax dipped monogram letter seals and loose leaf notebooks. Bon Bons- jujubes, chuckles and double bubble. Chocolate yoo hoo’s, dairy queen sundaes and red licorice strings. Dave Clark Five, Connie Francis and Charlotte Russe . Dobie Gillis, pink erasers, papagallos. Loden pea-coats vinyl jackets, mary jane patent leathers, and white shoe polish for ked sneakers. Apple Brown Betty in Swanson tv dinners, buitoni ravioli in the can and potato sticks. Sewing class, emenee toy trumpets and the morning show “Just for Fun.” The Mikado, Pirates of Penzance and Flower Drum Song. Won-ton soup, chopped suey and egg foo young. Peanut Butter and Jelly on Ritz Crackers with Campbells tomato soup. Spaldings, Jacks and 45’s. Army, Navy Stores, Kresge’s Dept. Store and Alexanders. Mohair sweaters, shift dresses, mini and maxi skirts, baby doll dresses, colored tights- stirrup pants. Science projects on Oak Tag, pencil sharpeners and No. 8 pencils. Revlon Rum Raisin lipstick and Mary Quant make-up. Shalimar, Joy, Ambush, jade east, english leather and Old Spice. Po-ke-no, parchessi and Simon. Bonanza, Gunsmoke and Wagon Train. Make it a throw back Saturday.

The Muse Descends!

And just like that Father Time swoops in and says you know that Plan B, and second choice not from column A – we’re there. As Father time always wins, at first we are obedient as the advantages of medicare, metro card savings on each ride, and Tuesday two for one at CVS and Shop-Rite are certainly appealing. Although aging body parts are not optional our mentation, get up and go attitudes certainly can be. So, as the Muse Descends (oh hello Cousin Joyce) we listen to the percussion as we turn the beat around (Gloria Gaynor) and choose to hang with the people who help to add warm blanket comfort. We champion looking
the other way “mamala” when our friends repeat stories, and we wait an extra minute when strolling over to Lexington Ave with a slower walker. Blessings duly noted- as at least we aren’t on hold for 45 minutes listening to Creedence Clear Water on instant repeat or perseverating over unanswered texts. So just for today wear a new shirt, use up your favorite lipstick and add an extra topping on your tasti-delite. Make it a Great Thursday!

Last night we followed Rabbi Lookstein down the rabbit hole. He has the Midas touch. His message came through loud and clear. In a world filled with massive chaos we need to work harder toward being less divided. Yes, Rabbi yes. Whatever our individual affiliation toward Judaism or Christianity is we are much more alike then divided in our prayer for peace. We broke bread and shared a Friday Eve Shabbat dinner which was being shared in temples across America. Same time, different city. We sat down with two dear friends and as we often do, raised a glass, toasted to health and dug in. More typical, our evenings shared could be called Pizzagate and we don’t eat pizza together. Here we were at an across the country event in our own backyard. Congregation Kehilath Jeshurun hosted the evening. Foremost caterers served the delicious meal. This is where our eight grandchildren Davan and ultimately are educated. Ramaz, the school they attend is part of KJ. The evening was laden with prayer, song and words of gratitude. We were sharing a rite of passage in a communal setting that spread across the country. This memory in the making brought back childhood memories and I wept inside. Papa can you hear me? My dear friend felt the flood too. We pushed aside our worries and counted our blessings one at a time. We all walked away with a gratitude list. There was no judgment on any faces, that in itself a blessing. Petty indifferences, mere misunderstandings and broken dinner dates were minimalized by what really matters and what sits in the forefront of our hearts. With lots on our plates we realized our plates are big enough to handle, come what may. At least for last night. Fingers crossed and pinky swears hopefully longer. What a relief from the chaos of “cell phone dining.” As we looked around the room we observed the crowd and marveled at the cohesion. Singing, loud talking and the patter of children running out the door, in between courses replaced the sound of texts and emails coming in. Oh wishing star I thank you for answering one more prayer, for one more day. As a realist, I woke up today knowing that as any encapsulated moment in time, our partaking in Shabbat Across America added another corner piece to our puzzle in the making. As long as love still wears a smile- we’re in.

Repost kind of day!

The room was comfortably full, not packed. The A/C offered a Brrr so any remnant of heat left over from Indian Summer was left outside our “four walls.”Rabbi Lookstein walked up to the podium with his particular cadence I’ve come to know through the years. I was appropriately clad in the “right” length skirt. And so the stage was set, the evening began.

I was at KJ Synagogue to hear Dr. Rabbi Ari Berman, President of Yeshiva University speak. The write up about the evening caught my eye and the kids set me up to gain entrance. He spoke on Sin, Self Perception and the Art of Living. 

The timing for me to hear this was propitious. Yes, G-d offers no coincidences. I walked away from the evening a little more fine tuned on some immediate issues that have been dealt to my extended family.

He touched on the distinction between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. He detailed the difference in prayer between looking at and embracing your sins, your misgivings and your wrongdoings. He was light on the emphasis of sins necessarily being terrible shandas worthy of punishments and more on ways we have wronged others. He moved on to the meaning of wearing white on Yom Kippur and praying for the forgiveness of the past year’s behaviors that we feel we can better. He was straightforward, his words flowed with a pleasant melody and his sincerity offered comfort. We, as Jewish people are factually in the minority. 

Our importance and roles in society however, quite the contrary. What was in the minority last night as well, were cells phones beeping, ringing or being accessed. We were there to listen, perhaps learn and be respectful of a very busy man sharing his knowledge and wisdom about keeping the peace pipe moving. L’dor V’dor. 

I left the Rabbi’s sermon feeling comfortable, embraced and that my well being was cared about by a virtual stranger, an ordained man.

In the love your neighbor category and a look after your own way, I question why it is often easier to be more kind to strangers than intimates. As a divine order play out, we are placed in positions, in families and situations that because we are “just humans” will inevitably offer conflict and need for repair. So perhaps just for today, four days short of wearing a white outfit and maybe even sneakers why not look to our left, glance to our right and say we are sorry to an intimate we may have wronged. Perhaps if we begin to own our piece of behavior we can move on in a healthy way to the sounds of cell phones ringing and beeps of texts coming in. Amen!

Dina and Nechama- Thank you for allowing me to experience and create a memory I will never forget. I walked away in a bit of a shock, as I can’t quite believe this is 2016. The tenor of the morning was so very archaic. I initially was devastated. I then realized the sense of unity, determination and spirit amongst your exceptional group of women was inspirational at the very least. I became lost in thought with my form of prayer close to heart. I was allowing nothing to get in my way. I got out of it more than I could have ever imagined. bh 🙏