For so long you sat on the fence- jumping when the phone rang- cringing at the indecent and abusive mix up of names in the hospital- and sighed in disbelief as you watched your Dad walk toward you from across a parking lot. Last night your limited strength kept you vertical. I watched your struggle as I did when you tried to situate yourself in the car after lunch at The Soho Charcuterie with Your baby sequestered in your belly- some 35 years ago.Your fragility was worn across your face in such a pronounced, needing to be plucked way. I know your physiognomy spanning our lifetime. Your vulnerability a very embryonic look. Crying on the inside expressed with a flat-line stare.

I pray today you tip-toe toward your recovery from weeks ago. My wish is that you get back to sea level, emerge from the stranglehold of confusion and breathe life back into your beautiful soul. 

You have served as the oxygen tank for your population. Simply one hat you wore with aplomb.

Hand me the tank, give me the hat! I have a two new cans of paint. Your choice pink or red. Choose one quickly- their purpose to paint a smile back on your face. Hurry before the paint dries. Sometimes, maybe the transfer of the torch helps get the one lagging behind, straight thru to the finish line. We all have a chapter we don’t read out loud!

“I pledge allegiance to the Flag of the United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands, one Nation, under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.” The Un-ited Staes of America. “And the world will be a better place.” So ya think? Diana Ross who’s touching whose hand now? 

Fast forward to November 9, 2016. Winner take all? Does the derisive behavior of an entire nation disappear, get swept under the rug? Do the “losers” rally and protest? Does violence, street fights and overall crime escalate to off the chart numbers? Which side are you on Grandpa? Who are you voting for Judy? Babes, grandchildren questions supported with uninformed opinions, just 10 year old hearsay. Don’t vote for him/her they are going to do bad things to our country. Me- crying in the corner thinking is this how far we’ve come? Our children are fighting the fight. Politically, we are the Un-real McCoys. Rhetoric on the streets is negative, nasty and abusive. Does the country need a 12-step program? When do we go into recovery for antagonistic behaviors that we can’t control. 

We had dinner last eve at a favorite restaurant. The place is a delightful Pub which has been in business since St. Patrick’s day in 1967. It’s fed and welcomed crowds of political figures- aren’t we all? Besides the lamb chops being delicious and well known so is Jimmy- the owner. 

We are faces he recognizes and stops to chat. We are sitting in a red leather banquet under a picture of Jimmy with Mayor Bloomberg, Bill and up on the Hill?- police commissioner Bratton and his wife and a woman I don’t recognize. We hear the the woman who serves us say “they’re taking a picture of a picture.” We chat with Jimmy about the picture and the upcoming election.

We hear about the time Mayor Bloomberg flew him in his private plane home to his beloved Ireland. We discussed how Guiliani cleaned up the city, and what a disastrous performance by Dinkin’s. The bike lanes, a personal peeve of mine. Then onto Mayor Koch and how “nobody did it better.” Sing out Carly Simon. We don’t want the commercial to come on as we watch this real life reality show. We segue way to the bar and let our meal digest, our vodka’s assimilate and listen to the stories of the pictures lining the restaurants’s walls unfurl. He tells us proudly how many lbs. of fresh fish he has flown in daily. We marvel at the enthusiasm with which he tells the stories of how he migrated across our “borders” a long  time ago. He “made” it to his happy, successful place. A short man in stature and giant with Pride. He loves what he does and has a return crowd for 49 years. And we suppose amongst the politicians who have had the calves liver, the favorite lamb chops and the fresh, best in the city(we’re told) fish- has been eaten by potential rule makers who may not have “let him come in, sit down and have another.” When does unity kick in? With twelve step program success- let’s all join, form a coalition and put aside our preference to live with or without the bike lanes! G-d Bless America- we need you now!

“The Hungry Years”
Girl we made it to the top

We went so high we couldn’t stop

We climbed the ladder leading us nowhere

Two of us together

Building castles in the air
We spun so fast we couldn’t tell

The gold ring from the carousel

How could we know the ride would turn out bad

Everything we wanted

Was everything we had
I miss the hungry years

The once upon a time

The lovely long ago

We didn’t have a dime

Those days of me and you

We lost along the way
How could I be so blind

Not to see the door 

Closing on the world

I now hunger for

Looking through my tears

I miss the hungry years
We shared our daydreams one by one

Making plans was so much fun

We set our goals and reached the highest star

The things that we were after

Were much better from afar
Here we stand just me and you

With everything and nothing, too

It wasn’t worth the price we had to pay

Honey take me home 

Let’s go back to yesterday
I miss the hungry years

The once upon a time

The lovely long ago

We didn’t have a dime

Those days of me and you

We lost along the way
How could I be so blind

Not to see the door

Closing on the world 

I know hunger for 

Looking through my tears

I miss the hungry years

I miss the hungry years

My dream away movie starring Peter Sellers as an eccentric concert pianist and two young Brearley-esque ingenues who groupie their way around New York City. I had a crush on the entire movie. The friendship between Val and Gil served as the prototype for my best friendships and our shared tuna fish sandwiches with malteds stirred by pretzels. It was based on a book by Nora Johnson written in 1964. The movie directed by George Roy Hill also extrapolated the concept of infidelity. Ah! men. I too had my own Henry Orient in high school. Mr. Schmoltze the Director of the all school musical was my man crush. Loyalty is Royalty. Good friendships never go out of style. Stay in close touch with the friends that touch you deeply. Friendship and trust are synonymous. “We’ll always be bosom buddies, friends, sisters and pals. “I’ll always be Alice Toklas if you’ll be Gertrude Stein. Auntie Mame had her priorities in order at least when it came to friendships. Sometimes we call our friend just to hear her voice. There is a treasured certainty in knowing we haven’t thrown each other out after all the tales of woe we’ve shared. Our discussions so much cheaper than therapy. We paint a picture, create a collage or write a poem inserting a compilation of shared memories. We know we will never “Walk Alone.” 

So did Kelly Ripa get thrown under the bus over Michael Strahan’s departure? Lack of loyalty and trust and over is over. We think of Betty and Veronica’s chasing after Archie and Reggie. We loved the Lucy and Ethel make chocolate episode. Louise flees to Mexico and Thelma drives alongside of her. Who didn’t weep as we watched Barbara Hersey become the wind beneath Bette Midler’s wings in Beaches? How about that bond that Aibileen and Minny developed through bigotry and hardship in The Help. I can’t stop the examples as they flood thru my veins. The truth that friendships reveal are delightfully overwhelming. Blood sisters, pen pals, sorority sisters, bridge partners string together the medicinal benefits of your inner circle. We lend each other gowns and jewelry for special events. We treat each other to lunch in the “just because” sense. 

Then sometimes we sit quietly, say very little as those moments of silence speak volumes about “how deep is our ocean, how high is our sky.”

Bo to the tox and the forehead looks younger

Go to the thighs cause they tell you no lies 

As gravity tugs at our mugs with full force

Can’t look any younger by taking a course

Esteem to the team with eyes opened wide

Into home base we score wth full pride

Our mojo and moxie helps dig and look deeper

We mellow, we chill, we’re considered a keeper

Match up to our egos we know our self worth

We are one of of a kind on this entire earth

Consider the knife to smooth our appearance

We go to the doc and ask for some clearance

We fast over night cause we gotta look tighter, back out of the deal cause we pulled an all-nighter

So Vixen and Rudolph strap into ur sleigh

Ain’t going under that knife

No fricken way

We’ll accept what we look like cause older is wiser

We ain’t going backwards, we’re no compromiser

Let’s call up our buddies who know us so deep

So happy to hear how we’re perfect when asleep

With gumption and courage we hold our head’s higher

Came into our own the seller, not buyer

We like how we look and we feel so damn good

We heard it for sure from a friend in our hood

Please hand me a tissue! Truman Capote fan here. Southern Socialite, brilliant, clever, different and raconteur extraordinaire. Invited to dine with The Cafe Society Set and was often seen having ” Breakfast at Tiffany’s,” with Jackie O. And I quote Truman- Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act.- for the faint of emotional heart Passover this post. He lived a dichotomous existence. Recluse by day as a writer and Studio 54’d it by night. From the tables at Côte Basque and Grenouille, dinner parties at the 720 and 740 buildings on Park Avenue he, charmed the pants off Babe Paley and her CBS husband Bill. 

“To me, the greatest pleasure of writing is not what it’s about, but the inner music that words make.”Truman”got” the condiments of life and lived it spicy. His writing was fluid and lyrical. He killed it with a Mockingbird. Was often surrounded by glamour, beauty and brains. Words and Music- from Sesame Street and Shari Lewis to The Voice and America’s Got Talent. The nexus of entertainment doesn’t vary in the writing and leaves us with our own inner voice. His devastating childhood served as the motivation for his “Cold blooded” writing. 

Let’s get busy. Make whatever act you’re in count the most. Add an extra plate to your table and invite that interesting person you met to dinner. Take out the easel, finish the sweater you started knitting or plant the garden with your grandchildren. The do it today’s fall by the wayside too often than not. We are all guilty of this big time. 

The sudden loss of Prince has social media exploding. His talent skyrocketed and even the “Pretty Women” wanted his extra time and his kiss. Ah! That extra time, that kiss- so you think you can dance? Go call Fred Astaire’s and grab your honey to the dance floor. 

Motivate your way thru the matzoh and Dance like no one’s watching. No secret- they’re Not!

Please hand me a tissue! Truman Capote fan here. Southern Socialite, brilliant, clever, different and raconteur extraordinaire. Invited to dine with The Cafe Society Set and was often seen having ” Breakfast at Tiffany’s,” with Jackie O. And I quote Truman- Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act.- for the faint of emotional heart Passover this post. He lived a dichotomous existence. Recluse by day as a writer and Studio 54’d it by night. From the tables at Côte Basque and Grenouille, dinner parties at the 720 and 740 buildings on Park Avenue he, charmed the pants off Babe Paley and her CBS husband Bill. 

“To me, the greatest pleasure of writing is not what it’s about, but the inner music that words make.” Truman “got” the condiments of life and lived it spicy. His writing was fluid and lyrical. He killed it with a Mockingbird. Was often surrounded by glamour, beauty and brains. Words and Music- from Sesame Street and Shari Lewis to The Voice and America’s Got Talent. The nexus of entertainment doesn’t vary in the writing and leaves us with our own inner voice. His devastating childhood served as the motivation for his “Cold blooded” writing. 

Let’s get busy. Make whatever act you’re in count the most. Add an extra plate to your table and invite that interesting person you met to dinner. Take out the easel, finish the sweater you started knitting or plant the garden with your grandchildren. The do it today’s fall by the wayside too often than not. We are all guilty of this big time. 

The sudden loss of Prince has social media exploding. His talent skyrocketed and even the “Pretty Women” wanted his extra time and his kiss. Ah! That extra time, that kiss- so you think you can dance? Go call Fred Astaires  and grab your honey to the dance floor.  

 Motivate your way thru the matzoh and Dance like no one’s watching. No secret- they’re Not!

“He kept his distance as a way of avoiding “propinquity.” A word I have looked up at least 20 times since I first came upon it many years ago. An immediate definition is closeness.The best example of the word is the mannerisms of siblings. The similarity in how they they gesticulate (gestures, often dramatic ones.) Sometimes represented in their tone of voice or obvious in their gait. The “I can’t believe you are a fan of fluffer- nutters too,” and all the “a ha” moments of recognition– love love!! I am fascinated with stories of siblings and insidious similarities revealed in time. I just listened to a well worthwhile study on the “happiest of people.” It was done at Harvard. It tracked the lives of several men spanning a 60 year or so period of time. It was sent to me by a new acquaintance who I relate to on several levels and enjoy learning about how much we see eye to eye. We connect thru humor and make each other laugh. I’ll second that emotion. Shout out to RG.

The key points in the study reveal and emphasis the necessity of social interaction. The happiest of people in this study stay connected, create connections and maximize time well spent. Avoid “Loneliness” at any cost. Easy for you to say. Alone is not always lonely, unless someone points it out as something overdone. 

Replace workmates for playmates. Learn a new social skill set and share it often. Join a book club, learn tennis ( if your knees can bear it) go to concerts, shows, movies lectures with others. 

Obvious for sure, the reality of benefit often underestimated. As time goes by, hopefully we learn there are no magic bullets. Sweat equity pans out as the quickest way to the finish line. We stand on the line that says “carry on bags only.” We proudly hold up the well deserved sign “No fixer uppers wanted.” 

Last night in smoozing over our game of play- my new BFF took out a little white button that one of the women inadvertently left at her place. She handed it to her and when it feel out of her hand and onto another kitchen floor I thought this button is the message in the madness. My take away is that you can try your best to hold on to people, places and things for only so long. The “meant to be’s,” in the continuance of time, are the gifts. We unwrap them deliberately slowly, in an attempt to embellish and embrace life’s treasures. That button left on yet another floor represents to me the not wanting to let go of the moments of shared games, shared brisket sandwiches and the dorm like manner as “we”walk to our next Happy Place. Wednesday let’s Rock it! 

 

Janis Ian Beauty Queen, Stay away from the girl that’s mean

Your music gathered great success

Helped the rest of us through the mess

When you see yourself for who you are

And your friend’s blow kisses from a far

Just know the kids of now a day

Have much to get thru to see their way

Collect the memories 

Label them fun

Get it going, become number Won

Smell flowers, drink wine

Pay it forward and then

Look around and make sure you do it again

Here’s looking toward Tuesday 

Don’t wait to begin

You’ll be thankful and grateful

You got your vote in

I’m writing and rapping

Getting ready to play, the score to Hamilton

It will show me the way

With tickets in hand 

Of how our country began

O’ say can you see

And pledge allegiance to thee! 

 

What a gorgeous and glorious day all in one.- Each grouping of valued guests intertwined and became Team Bella- the coalition of love, formidable. The emotions were palpable, albeit played out casually and precious. The smoke from the peace pipe shrouded the room like a high in the sky cloud with no threat of disappearing. We all will know this baby, soon to arrive, in a distinctive and personal way.Yes, the day was to pre-welcome Bella Sophia into our wonderful world, in her time. I can only imagine she’s in no rush as my niece is a 24 yr. old Trauma Nurse at a volumed Westchester Medical Center. Her daughter to-be has been observing her Mom in full swing, at full expression for nine months. 

My niece is emotionally well seeded. She shines and sparkles and it began as an inside job. My gyroscopic view of her exemplary qualities fall into the “wows and the aw’s” with the entire population along her path. She always had the goods. We suspected that sequestered in her deep and wide dimples was her secret potion. Her thank you notes were charming, her knees jerk hugs filled with generosity. I always knew her shy-like requests for help with homework, was more a reach out to bond than a need for assistance. Through quiet observation she blended her talent and personality and wove her “expression” into a style everyone on Shark Tank is offering to take stock in. 

My laudatory expose of my baby niece perhaps biased through genetics maybe one percent. She brings out the winner in all of us. Her patients have to believe if they can be saved they will be. Yes, it’s that important a gig.

Then one day the man she loves came along. I can only imagine he, like those who cried at her Bat Mitzvah had a glimpse that her obvious beauty had so much more to it.

And Now on to Robo- the girl in Lesley’s autograph “Granny to be- Soulmate Lesley.” Well baby sister at the helm, progenitor of Nurse Jackie- get out your tissues, pour another cup of coffee, take a bow, then take another. Run on sentences of platitudes would only touch the honor you deserve. Soph did the treadmill and on the cool down this is what she listened to – Hit it Barry! 

“I made it through the rain/ I kept my world protected/ I made it through the rain /I kept my point of view- And found myself respected. By the others who- Got rained on too- and made it through! 

Dear Mickey, she watched you turn the pages as you read the paper- she followed. You always had your hands on her back and covered her heart with your being. Get ready grandpa- she got you a ticket for the rollercoaster. When you get to the top and you see a little girl waving strong know that your baby had a baby who thinks your one swell guy too!