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Norman Lear’s sentiments  in Carl Reiner’s documentary on aging “If You’re Not in the Obit, Eat Breakfast,” -exactly! His credo is find your “hammock” and live in the “now.” As he sees it the transition of time in between the “ok it’s over, to what’s next, is when his productivity kicked in. At the end of a writing project, leading with humor and sending a message -he kept hundreds of people in his audience laughing. And I quote- Go Beat that- Happy 100 years yesterday Mr. Lear. 

HBO launched the documentary, catch it if you can. Mel Brooks is hysterical, Dick Van Dyke glides across the dance floor, Norman Lear is brilliant, Carl Reiner orator extraordinare. They were all Nonagenarians -Mr.Reiner RIP -Mr. Lear Happy “100” omg years. 

A big take away message is if you spend too much time working off disappointments and complications you will be one miserable soul. Excuses hold no water when they are used without discretion. Give hugs, go where the tariff is reciprocal and strong. 

The future might be an assumption but when you “find yourself in times of trouble,” find your version of Mother Mary and become the ambassador of your estate. 

One thing long “livers”had in common, whether or not chopped “liver” and french fries were mainstays is that they fell in love with lots of things. They attached passion to their activities. They honed hobbies and had specific collections. Please pass the salt and pepper shakers -collection strong. Cole Porter, hit it- “The night is young, the skies are clear-So if you want to go walking dear. It’s delightful, it’s de-lovely, it’s delirious.”  And now Baruch Dayan  Ha Emet. And I quote Mr. Lear. 

Life is about having a good time, and it was a good time…🥲

Many years ago pre cell phones as a single real estate broker I had a “change purse” filled with dimes to make from the phone booth on the corner calls. Run on sentence counters that one’s for you,
One day after leaving the bank to deposit a commission check on an apartment I sold at 120 East 79th Street to an old friend who was relocating to- at that time Ed Koch’s Big Apple, I experienced a ny crime story gone awry.
Michael and I were both single at the time and although that certain spark to help create any romantic interest wasn’t there we became fast friends. During our apt. hunting time together we would meet at Bemelmans Bar at The Carlyle Hotel, have a cocktail and dig into their well known hand made potato chips that were strategically placed on the bar.

Particularly during the holiday season after we listened to Bobby Short work his magic with all 88 keys on the piano we thought wow, yes Bobby it certainly is “The Most Wonderful Time of The Year.” In the greatest city.
At times we would order another round and a burger. We had Fun. The 90’s in the city had a strong financial system and high culture flourished. It felt good pounding the pavements to our next big deal, or not.
Back to the dimes. So this one particular day I left the bank and strolled along Madison Avenue proudly sporting a new fur coat I bought with the commission I made on Michael’s apt. A man approached me to let me know I had something on the back of my coat. He looked vaguely familiar and as I tried to place him I realized I had seen him sitting in a chair at the bank I had just left. He suggested I take my coat off and he would help clean off what felt like the better part of a bottle of Jergens lotion. Something clicked and I ran off and quickly grabbed a cab. I glanced back to see him and another man standing together.
This experience helped form my living cautiously in NYC ways. Naive no more. Close but no cigar.
So very fast forward, decades later, no fur coat in sight and as a one only Stoli drinker we are heading out of the city. It is no longer our New York.

We always thought we would age out here, ordering food in and catching first run movies at The Paris Theater. Yes Jackie Gleason “away we go.” We will always tap into a New York State of mind, especially when someone bumps into us with their cart as we are buying fruits and vegetables at The Boys. Adios Friend.

As an apprentice under Oscar Hammerstein.

Consummate wordsmith brought words to the point of a rhyme.

His work spanned theatrical lifetimes, his sense of rhythm, was simply sublime. 

His content dictated the form as a sentence.

Turned a paragraph into a story. 

Ushered his “company” in through the ringing of chimes.

Sinatra sent in the clowns.

Bernadette Peters took a walk through the Park with George.

Ambition only superceded by talent.

Like when “good things get bettter/bad things get worse/Wait—I think I meant that in reverse.”

He took us “Into the Woods” and in good “Company” were we.

Every theater lyric a short tale, every line the weight of a paragraph you see.

“A funny thing happened on the way to the forum,” with a “Little Night Music,”

And a “Gypsy” or three.

With “Passion” he composed the story. 

From the “West Side” of the street was the call. 

Dear Mr. Sondheim, in our memory, you will always, yes always stand tall. 

You threw a lot of spaghetti and most of it stuck to the wall.

  “There ought to be clowns.

Well maybe next year.”

       -No Smoking Zone-

Lucky Strike strike me lucky. We pulled into a New-port- got up onto our Camel rode off toward Parliament turned onto Marlboro Plaza corner of Salem Square and ran into the Kent of Earl. All the while hoping our Chesterfield coat kept us warm and made us look Kool. We’ve come a long way baby- my has Virginia gotten Slim. Phew!

Grew flowers and vegetables. 🌼🌺
Opened bottles and popped corks.🍸🍷
Scents of candles.
Smells of french toast, veggie nuggets and secret sauce. A.k.a. The regular.
Mixed mj tiles🀄️
Shuffled canasta cards-❤️♣️♠️♦️
Did art projects and made shadowbox presents with love.
Snuggled thru nights wrapped in grandchildren’s arms. Hashtag Blessed.
Roasted chickens we ate through the glow of shabbas candles. Challah strong.
Listened to the musical soundtracks that were the backdrop of our lives.
Watched dance routines practiced for recitals. Alexa play -Somewhere Over the Rainbow. 🌈
Built buildings , space centers and parking lots with blocks and magna-tiles.
Binge watched our way through weekends.
Recovered from thank g-d not many surgical procedures. Shout out to Nurse Joyce.
Prayed.🙏
Wiped up more spilled milk then we cried over.
Welcomed friends and friends of friends.
Held choruses of more Happy b-days through more candles then we could count.
Rejoiced in family. Better together.
Sat shiva for our parents- b”h
Cried in each other’s arms.
Had passover seders. Hail to the matzoh man.
Chanukah parties- grab bag presents.
Dressed for bar mitzvahs, weddings and funerals.
Disseminated unfortunate news and made lemonade out it.

And knew all along, through good nights or restless sleeps that this was the “Place We Called Home.”

Disneyland, Disney World add dolls in wheelchairs to “It’s a Small World” attraction.

They had no more raisin bran muffins left at our local deli so we went to corn, Plan B. The restaurant only had a 6:00 or 9:30 time slot available to dine. So yes, we went to Plan B. 

The bus was really overcrowded so we waited for the next one- yup-Plan B.

One and done meager, alternative, are you kidding me easy choices.

Up again early, in a time to make the donuts moment we watched the news as Christina Applegate, (Married with Children! Etc.) received her Star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.

She was barefoot and being held by her co-star Katey Segal. She was grateful and weepy as she explained her latest diagnosis of MS.

We binged watched her performance in the Dead to Me, tv series. What is touted as her best and funniest laugh out loud work is Anchorman, with Will Ferrell. 

She is a versatile actress. Funny, clever, engaging. We really like her style.

In the everybody got something category, as we drank our early morning coffee and ate our plan b muffin we read the newspaper and came upon the story about Dolls in Wheelchairs at Disney. 

This newly added diversity representing a population of children, who in the everyone got something category live with the physical limitation of getting up and walking to the pool.

In 2019 Ali Stoker caught our attention on Glee. She was the first person on Broadway to perform from her wheelchair. She was paralyzed since youth from a spinal cord injury…… as a result of a car accident. After her acclimation through her initial omg shock , she never begrudged her fate, studied performance art and went the distance, sitting down. 

If anything her disability served as a motivator and helped propel her all the way to her Tony winning performance in Oklahoma.

Ali Stoker has since become part of the #AerieREAL Role Model Campaign. It is a body positive and inclusivity initiative led by the underwear retailer Aerie. The campaign highlights a diverse group of women from varied industries and backgrounds and uses their unretouched photos in ads. 

So just for today let’s embrace our individuality, mix in our limitations, kick the crap out of Plan B —and remember when it comes down to it- “It’s a small world after all.” Make someone else’s day.